Steve Ballmer is fired up about all the plumbing at the new Clippers arena.
The Clippers are moving from the Crypto.com Arena to brand new digs near SoFi Stadium in 2024, and Ballmer, the former Microsoft leader who owns the franchise, did a barnstorming media appearance on Tuesday to hype everyone up about the relocation.
Ballmer was especially excited about all the bathrooms the new Intuit Dome will include.
“Toilets!” Ballmer exclaimed. “1,160 toilets and urinals! Three times the NBA average! … We do not want people waiting around. We want them back to their damn seats.”
Even if it’s easy to mock him, anyone who has ever been to a sold-out sporting event can appreciate the innovation Ballmer is talking about.
There are times at basketball, baseball or football games where you could be gone from your seat for upward of a half-hour if nature calls at the wrong time.
Mike Francesa and Chris Russo once had a legendary debate about how long it took to go to the bathroom at the old Yankee Stadium where it seemed as if their heads might spontaneously combust out of the passion for which they were arguing about the subject.
Another potential ulterior motive for the Clippers to ratchet up the potty supply at their new arena is that it could make people even less hesitant to guzzle down $20 beers, lest they worry about missing some of the action on the court.
Though the the toilet tirade is going to invariably get a majority of the headlines, Ballmer was speaking to commemorate the steel topping of the roof at the arena.
When it’s all said and done, the arena will cost $2 billion to construct.
The Clippers are 34-33 this season and currently in eighth place in the Western Conference.