Jennifer Lopez on dating Ben Affleck the first time: ‘It turned out to really bite us’


Jennifer Lopez said that she has achieved what she calls “true happiness” since marrying Ben Affleck.

The December Vogue cover star reflected on her relationship the first time around with the “Gone Girl” actor, whom she married in July.

“We were so young and so in love at that time, really very carefree, with no kids, no attachments. And we were just living our lives, being happy and out there. It didn’t feel like we needed to hide from anybody or be really discreet,” said the “Marry Me” star.

The pair first met on the set of “Gigli” in 2001 and began dating the following year. They broke up in 2004, calling off their engagement.

“We were just living out loud, and it turned out to really bite us. There was a lot underneath the surface there, people not wanting us to be together, people thinking I wasn’t the right person for him,” Lopez, 53, said.

“I became very guarded because I realized that they will fillet you. I really wish I could say more. I used to be like that. I am like that. But I’ve also learned,” she added.

Affleck and Lopez reunited in June 2021 after the “Good Will Hunting” star, 50, split from Jennifer Garner.

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The pair first met on the set of “Gigli” in 2001 and began dating the following year.
Pascal Le Segretain/Getty Images
Both Affleck and Lopez reunited in June of 2021 while the "Gone Girl" star was undergoing a bitter divorce from Jennifer Garner.
Affleck and Lopez reunited in June 2021.
Barry Chin/The Boston Globe via Getty Images

“Obviously we weren’t trying to go out in public. But I never shied away from the fact that for me, I always felt like there was a real love there, a true love there. People in my life know that he was a very, very special person in my life,” gushed the singer.

“When we reconnected, those feelings for me were still very real . . . I don’t know that I recommend this for everybody. Sometimes you outgrow each other, or you just grow differently. The two of us, we lost each other and found each other.”

According to the singer, she was surprised to know that people were upset that she had taken her husband’s last name.

“Obviously we weren’t trying to go out in public. But I never shied away from the fact that for me, I always felt like there was a real love there, a true love there.
“Obviously we weren’t trying to go out in public. But I never shied away from the fact that for me, I always felt like there was a real love there, a true love there.”
P. Lehman/Future Publishing via Getty Images

“People are still going to call me Jennifer Lopez. But my legal name will be Mrs. Affleck because we’re joined together. We’re husband and wife. I’m proud of that,” she said.

“I’m very much in control of my own life and destiny and feel empowered as a woman and as a person. I can understand that people have their feelings about it, and that’s OK, too. But if you want to know how I feel about it, I just feel like it’s romantic.”

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Lopez stressed that her relationship with Affleck was not always easy. They were both single parents and the process of integrating households was not a simple one.

The interview will appear in the December issue of Vogue.
The interview will appear in the December issue of Vogue.
Lopez stressed that her relationship with Affleck was not always easy. They were both single parents and the process of integrating households was not an easy one.
Lopez stressed that her relationship with Affleck was not always easy as they were single parents.

“The transition is a process that needs to be handled with so much care. They have so many feelings. They’re teens. But it’s going really well so far,” said Lopez.

“What I hope to cultivate with our family is that his kids have a new ally in me and my kids have a new ally in him, someone who really loves and cares about them but can have a different perspective.”

Lopez also called herself a romantic and said that everything she does — every album and film — is about love.

“My whole life, my whole music career was just about love: every movie I picked, every album I made. Even though I’m super proud of who I am today, and I wouldn’t change a f – – king thing.”



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