She can tell when the bride and groom are duh-duh-da-doomed.
Kristen Farris has a sixth sense when it comes to couples.
As a divorce lawyer for nearly two decades, the New Yorker knows whether a pair of just-married lovebirds are destined to fly off into the sunset — or crash and burn just after takeoff.
And when she spots those star-crossed sweethearts, Farris gifts them with a wedding present that’s been deemed “insane.”
“If I truly believe that they’re going to need it, I will put my business card in my wedding card,” said the attorney, 39, from Hudson Valley, to a TikTok audience of more than 774,000.
“I don’t do it to people I think will last,” said Farris. “I do it people that won’t last.”
It’s the gift of goodbye — right after “I do.”
But, per recent divorce reports, Farris might not be handing out her contact info as frequently as she did prior to the COVID-19 pandemic.
In fact, marriage rates in the U.S. have enjoyed a steady climb — especially in New York — while legal breakups have dwindled since the 2020 outbreak, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC).
However, unfortunately, divorce is still a nationwide epidemic.
It’s a serious issue that acutely plagues soured sweethearts in states such as Delaware, North Dakota, Oklahoma, Mississippi, Alabama, Arkansas and Kentucky, so say experts from DivorceLawyers.ca.
But Farris treats her little parting gift like a joke.
“Obviously, the people who invite me to their weddings know what I do for a living,” Farris explained to Newsweek, revealing that she’s gifted her business card to ill-fated darlings at least “eight to 10” times.
“So, first I try to add a nice little note in their card with some advice in a joking manner,” confessed the litigator. “Then I would write something witty like, ‘Should things not work out and you ever need me in the future, know that I’m here for only one of you.’”
And, luckily, her dark holy matrimony humor lands with most newlyweds.
“I almost always get them to laugh, or they start to fight over who gets me first,” said Farris. “That’s usually my favorite.
“I have tons of friends who tell their spouse they can’t have me in the divorce because they get me as their attorney.”
Farris went on to claim that the most glaring red flags of relationship death are a “lack of communication” and a difference in their life goals, such as having children or career choices.
“If they aren’t talking about their future choices early on, it’s a tell-tale sign they won’t last past 10 years,” she insisted, adding that constant criticisms between a twosome, too, indicate an impending split.
Although her intentions seem pure, Farris caught a firestorm of flak from virtual viewers who don’t find her wedding gift forewarnings funny.
“In their wedding card is insane,” spat an unamused commenter.
“That’s so tacky,” another barked. “I would not appreciate a ‘friend’ doing that.”
“Regardless of how you feel about the couple or what you think will happen, that is so rude,” an equally offended detractor wrote.
“Damn divorce attorney business card IN their wedding card is a bit sloppy,” added another.
However, a handful of folks argued that they would be grateful for Farris’ professional foresight.
“If you were my friend seeing me get married,” said an onlooker, “I’d appreciate the card before I say I do, please.”
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