This horndog likes it ruff.
A cheeky canine in the UK elicited sophomoric guffaws galore after unearthing a giant black dildo — a NSFW chew toy he refused to relinquish for 20 minutes until he received a treat, according to his dog walker.
“When I realized what it was, I was just like ‘oh my god,’ ” Happy Tails & Trails manager Claire Robson, 44, told Kennedy News of the X-rated incident, which occurred while she was walking her client’s pooch.
The 1-year-old cocker spaniel Frankie had reportedly disappeared into a hedge, whereupon he emerged a short while later with an unseen object in his mouth.
Initially thinking he had found a “plastic rubbery pipe because it was bouncing around,” Robson soon realized it was something far more salacious.
“It was a sex toy, which was about 10-inches long and was quite thick as well,” exclaimed the aghast rex-erciser. Accompanying photos show Frankie clutching his bouncy bone, which is black and riddled with “giant veins.”
Frankie was reportedly “very pleased” with his phallic find, according to Robson. “He wouldn’t come near us to start with because he’d found this ‘treasure,’ and he obviously thought it was great,” the Brit lamented. “He was having none of it, so he kept running away with it, I was like, ‘oh god.’”
After snapping a few pics of the X-rated bone to share with Frankie’s owner, Robson decided enough was enough and attempted to retrieve the rubber sex-cessory — but to no avail. She initially tried wooing the dogged dog with a treat, so she could snag him on the leash, but Frankie refused to swap out the dildo, Kennedy reported.
Thankfully, Robson finally succeeded after coaxing the stubborn mutt back to the car with another treat, whereupon she pried the plaything from his teeth using rubber gloves.
“I couldn’t get it off him, so I bribed him with a treat, so he’d come near us, and I put him back on the lead,” the beleaguered dog-lover described. “I didn’t want to touch it for hygiene [reasons] so I walked with him on the lead back to the van, and he jumped in his crate as usual.”
She added, “Once I’d taken the lead off, I gave him a treat, and he dropped it, so I quickly picked it up with a pair of gloves on and discarded it.”
All told, Frankie had paraded the sex toy around for a staggering 20 minutes before dropping it.
Nonetheless, Robson doesn’t hold Frankie’s phallic play sesh against him, as she claimed it’s a cocker spaniel’s “instinct to pick stuff up.
“If it was any of the dogs in the pack, it would have been Frankie that found it,” the bemused Brit added. “He’s a right character, he’s funny as well, so if anybody was going to find it — it would be him.”
Frankie’s owners were also reportedly amused over the canine’s randy retrieval. “I sent her [Frankie’s owner] the picture. She said she showed it to her whole office, and everyone was in hysterics,” Robson claimed.
Frankie isn’t the only animal with a hankering for humongous sex toys. In June, two Ohio anglers redefined “master-bait” after reeling in a catfish that had swallowed a dildo.