Wedding trends are almost impossible to ignore, but in following them, we end up creating an exquisite corpse.
You saw Mrs. Boldface Name do it Vogue or on Instagram. You loved it, but, wanted to put your spin on her idea. You post your ceremony on social media, inspiring others. Rinse and repeat, and you end up with a matrimonial mutant, a surreal ceremony that looks nothing like the inspiration.
“Wedding trends are evil,” said Preston Bailey, the New York-based celebrity wedding planner and floral artist responsible for creating many a viral wedding moment and more than few trends. “They make everyone a little bit lazy, just following whatever is happening at the moment.”
Bailey has been the planner du jour for decades, orchestrating ceremonies for Serena Williams and Alexis Ohanian; Catherine Zeta-Jones and Michael Douglas; Ivanka Trump and Jared Kushner; Donald Trump and Melania, and royals around the world.
In 2024, he had the world tuned in for the blockbuster $600 million “I do” of India’s richest man, Anant Ambani, to Radhika Merchant. Some 14,000 guests wer wowed by his extravagant floral arrangements that included moving animal sculptures.
He’s also patterned parties for the likes of Uma Thurman, Oprah, and Liza Minelli, and his influential books “Inspirations” and “Flowers’ are celebrating their 20th and 15th anniversaries, respectively.
But that’s not where the Panama-born planner started. ”People forget that the first wedding that I did was $300,” he said.
In fact, Bailey says one his missions is to help couples of more normal means “become trendsetters instead of followers.”
We asked this maestro of matrimony how to avoid trends, while taking away the best from spendthrift celebrity affairs.
Aim to entertain
If Bailey has a philosophy of event planning it goes something like this: “events are about entertainment.”
When he’s planning a supersized ceremony he designs “pretty environments” where “every half an hour there’s a wonderful surprise — a lighting change, something served, or something wonderful happening.”
The same rule can be applied to value-meal nuptials. The key is setting the tone at every stage. If there is a cocktail party, think about what you are going to do to set the tone? How will the music, lighting or performance work together? Then change it up again and again throughout the evening so that it isn’t monotonous. Punctuate each change with a small surprise.
Another tip: start slow and low and build. Don’t kick things off with the music blasting. Allow people to come together gently, and like a Broadway show, let the evening grow.
“Ultimately, guests are there for quite a while, and a lot of events are beautiful, but boring.” he said. “I know that I’ve succeeded when nobody wants to leave at the end of the evening. Then I know I nailed it.”
Centerpiece centrality
The first part of planning an eventful event is to establish the guest list. The second is to establish what is important to you. Then get serious about centerpieces.
“If you’re having a dinner, and you’re sitting guests at a table for a few hours, invest in what is on the table,” said Bailey.
A sexy centerpiece serves as the aforementioned surprise for that portion of the evening, and if you’re imagining monumental silver swans exploding with pricey pulchritudinous posies, stop right there.
“You don’t have to spend a million dollars to create an interesting centerpiece,” Bailey reassured. “A lot of couples are buying orchids, which are little bit affordable nowadays, and they last three to six months. It’s beautiful at the table, but at the same time has longevity.”
Be altar-native
Your guests are going to be staring straight at it, so make it interesting, but be careful because the altar is where social media’s more heinous trends come to life.
Bailey recommends candles to those who don’t want to hire an architect to design an arch, or half the Philadelphia Flower Show to fill it.
“Everybody’s looking at the altar,” he said. “And there are lots of ways of creating a beautiful visual that won’t break the bank, like votive candles. They cost pennies. Just use a ton of them.”
Less is more (again)
In the age of Instagram, everyone has seen everything. Now too many people try to do it all at once. Bailey says it’s finally time to pair things back — great news for anyone saving for a down payment.
“I’m one of the first people that, way back, came up with the concept that more is better, and I think that we are getting a little bit too carried away with that concept,” he said.
When it comes to flowers, maximalism means that arrangements go unappreciated. Instead, think like a gallery curator: buy seasonal blooms arranged with enough space to stand out.
“People are taking the idea that, ‘Oh my God, we have to use tons of flowers to create something that is beautiful,’ too far. I think it’s time to pull back a little bit,” he said.
The takeaway
Guests of celeb yokings walk away with serious swag. Noblesse oblige, that’s their business. But nobody wants a wine glass with your name etched on it or a download of your playlist.
Bailey recommends giving your guests what they really want: a sugar rush.
“Everybody loves sweets,” he said. “Maybe give Magnolia cupcakes, or your favorite cookie. Wrap it beautifully and give it as a giveaway bag that people could take home with them. Something edible is better than something that someone might regift.”
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