Callin’ out around the world — are you ready for a brand new beat? Summer’s here and the time is right for sitting quietly in a dark theater. I mean it! Hollywood is having its biggest sweaty season since at least 2019, with a much-anticipated release opening almost every single week for the next two … Read more
movie review IN THE GREY Running time: 97 minutes. Rated R (violence, language and a sexual reference). In theaters. During “In the Grey,” underworld characters call each other “clever” so many times that the viewer starts to wonder if these trigger-happy people, as well as the man who wrote their repetitive lines, really are clever … Read more
movie review THE SHEEP DETECTIVES Running time: 109 minutes. Rated PG (thematic material, some violent content and brief language). In theaters. A word of advice on the new movie “Sheep Detectives”: Give it a bleat. Sorry, a beat. The family film begins rather treacly, with a shepherd named George played by Hugh Jackman waxing poetic … Read more
movie review MORTAL KOMBAT II Running time: 116 minutes. Rated R (strong bloody violence and gore, and language). In theaters. No phrase terrifies me more than “for the fans,” because in the movies that tends to mean “awful and incomprehensible.” And so it does for “Mortal Kombat II,” an onscreen bucket of slop that people … Read more
It’s been 20 years, and glossy magazines are dropping like flies. But I’ve gotta hand it to the devil — she could’ve been a whole lot worse. movie review THE DEVIL WEARS PRADA 2 Running time: 119 minutes. Rated PG-13 (strong language, some suggestive references). In theaters Friday. “The Devil Wears Prada 2,” the sequel … Read more
movie review MICHAEL Running time: 127 minutes. Rated PG-13 (some thematic material, language, and smoking). In theaters. This is it? How flabbergasting to see “Michael,” the new biopic about Michael Jackson, the best-selling solo artist of all time, crash and burn into such a cheap and embarrassing bore. Say what you will about Michael Jackson … Read more
movie review Fallen Angels One hour and 30 minutes with no intermission. At the Todd Haimes Theatre, 227 W. 42nd Street. There’s not much more to “Fallen Angels,” Noël Coward’s rice-paper-thin 1925 comedy, than two sex-crazed women getting wasted. That brief synopsis alone probably just sent a bunch of you racing to the box office … Read more
movie review LEE CRONIN’S THE MUMMY Running time: 133 minutes. Rated R (gore, brief drug use, language, strong violent content). In theaters. I never thought I’d miss the Scorpion King. But as gallons of oily vomit spewed and bloody skin got gruesomely peeled off a girl’s leg in “Lee Cronin’s The Mummy,” The Rock’s rocky … Read more
Home movie review THE SUPER MARIO GALAXY MOVIE Running time: 98 minutes. Rated PG (action, mild violence, and rude humor). In theaters. In a perfect world, fed-up audiences would say, “Let’s-a-go see something else.” Alas, “The Super Mario Galaxy Movie,” the exhausting sequel to 2023’s “The Super Mario Bros. Movie,” will make $1 billion just like its awful predecessor … Read more
movie review THE DRAMA Running time: 106 minutes. Rated R. In theaters April 3. Good thing it’s called “The Drama.” A nice name like “The Wedding” would be extremely misleading. Even “The Couple” could end up a date-night disaster. Titling this oddity “The Drama” is, at least, not a bait and switch. Still, I wouldn’t be surprised … Read more
movie review PROJECT HAIL MARY Running time: 157 minutes. Rated PG-13 (thematic material and suggestive references). In theaters March 20. Now entering the pantheon of lost-and-alone movies is “Project Hail Mary,” a hugely entertaining — and just plain huge — surprise during a depressing month that’s typically Hollywood’s dumping ground for wince-worthy trash. It hits you like an … Read more
movie review THE BRIDE ZERO STARS. Running time: 127 minutes. Rated R (strong/bloody violent content, sexual content/nudity and language). In theaters March 6. Leave her at the altar! She is “The Bride!,” one of the absolute worst movies I have had the displeasure of watching in this job. It’s a struck-by-lightning shocker to see a … Read more
Just when you think Pixar’s petting-zoo cute new movie “Hoppers” is flagrantly ripping off James Cameron, the characters come clean. movie review HOPPERS Running time: 105 minutes. Rated PG (action/peril, some scary images and mild language). In theaters March 6. “You guys, this is like ‘Avatar’!,” squeals 19-year-old Mabel (Piper Curda), the studio’s rare college-age … Read more
movie review SCREAM 7 Running time: 114 minutes. Rated R (strong bloody violence, gore, and language.) In theaters. In the middle of the stupefyingly bad seventh “Scream” movie, Sidney Prescott asks her daughter’s boyfriend, “Do you know anything about AI?” Oh, I screamed all right. Noooo! Anything but another slapdash horror film with a lazy plot that hinges on … Read more
movie review HOW TO MAKE A KILLING Running time: 105 minutes. Rated R (language and some violence/bloody images). In theaters Feb. 20. There are eight deaths in “How to Make a Killing.” Seven are people and one is done-dirty source material. The blood. So much blood. Writer-director John Patton Ford has misguidedly modernized “Kind Hearts … Read more
movie review 28 YEARS LATER: THE BONE TEMPLE Running time: 110 minutes. Rated R (strong bloody violence, gore, graphic nudity, language throughout and brief drug use). In theaters Jan. 16. The final scene of last year’s “28 Years Later” was pretty damn demented, even by the messed-up standards of a postapocalyptic horror series in which … Read more
movie review GREENLAND 2: MIGRATION Running time: 98 minutes. Rated PG-13 (some strong violence, bloody images, and action). In theaters. Welcome to “Greenland 2.” No, not the 51st state — the unnecessary bore of a sequel starring gruntin’ Gerard Butler. The Scottish actor with the gravelly growl of an acid reflux sufferer who just got … Read more
Before it became a rom-com classic, “Notting Hill” almost lost its biggest star, Julia Roberts. Roberts, 58, said she initially dismissed the film as “so f–king stupid,” questioning the premise before discovering the charm that ultimately convinced her to sign on. “Gosh, I just remember when my agent called me about ‘Notting Hill,’ and I thought, … Read more
Showbiz is getting ready to pop the cork at midnight on Jan. 1. But first allow me to burst their bubble. Like the schlub who pledges to go to the gym more, the entertainment industry could always use some improvement. Here are my New Year’s resolutions for movies, Broadway and TV. “Stranger Things” returned for … Read more
A line I get a lot is, “Being a movie critic must be the best job in the world.” You’d think! But Hollywood so often has other ideas. Even considering that there are always far more dogs released annually than winners — check out my best-of-the-year list for those — 2025 was a real doozy. … Read more